In Dr. Stephen Porges’ profound book The Polyvagal Theory, he notes the “neuroendocrine and autonomic systems that permit high levels of social behavior and social bonds regulate the management of stressful experiences and the capacity of the mammalian body to heal itself….In the context of safety or comparatively mild or acute stressors, the release of oxytocin can promote health and restoration. In the context of chronic stress or fear, the actions of the same adaptive systems might have consequences that appear detrimental or destructive.” (296) There is no black-and-white, there is only our perception of what is happening to us. How can you reframe a negative event or stressor today as neutral or even positive? Where can you find some deep and rewarding learning in your pain? The beneficial use of oxytocin, just one of may adaptive chemicals in our bodies, relies on your ability to navigate the shades of gray between our own rigid black-and-white reactions.
To learn how to reframe and rewire your thoughts check out New Beliefs, New Brain